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Friday, May 15, 2009

How Not to Write a Love Letter

I was browsing a few old compositions and I saw something that I'd like to share to my readers (if there are any out there). Just a few tips on how NOT to write a love letter. How to write one? I have no idea. All of the examples sited are actual excerpts from actual love letters. The grammatical errors alone make them worth reading.

First. It is important to use a different sheet of paper before writing it on your very precious stationery. You wouldn't want to make any erasures on your scented stationery. Second. Make sure to check your spelling. That's what dictionaries are for. For the grammar, you better consult your grammar books for that. Third. Don't give out-of-season greetings; Merry Christmas when it's still August, or Happy Valentines Day in December. Not even when you insert the word 'advanced.'

Here are some line that you might want to avoid writing:

"I know your be surprise upon receiving this"

It has bad grammar written all over it. I'm not saying how it suppose to be written. That's what grammar books are for.

"I know your astonish upon receiving this message letter of mine."

What in the world is a 'message letter?' I did get what he's trying to say but this is too much. Keep it simple.

"When I first see you I know that your attitude is good and most especially respecting to each other."

Uh... I don't know what he's trying to say.

For these lines: "But please don't be angry.", "But again I thought of you getting angry for you might misinterpret my intentions.", "I'm very ready to accept everything, everything that you'll slap my face."

Angry? I don't think the receiver would be angry. Happy perhaps. Laughing is more like it.

"Now: I need you. Someday: I meet you. Because: I love you.", "Love is forever if no one can breaker."

You have got to be kidding me. First, corny. Second, this isn't one of your slum notes.

"From the lowest to the highest common denominator of my heart. I have a survey from east to west, north to south an I found out that your structural design in connection with your body is the most magnificent or the most significant in engineering technology."

That sounded like a cross between engineering and pornography if you ask me.

Maybe a few of these lines would show your humorous side. I mean most women like men with a good sense of humor. But don't overdo it. If you do, your just showing your unintelligent side.

Monday, May 11, 2009

WTF Stop Over Resto


I went to Bataan one day for my usual trips. I had to take cutting trips to get to my destination because there was no bus going directly to where I was going. First bus I took was from Cubao to Lubao, Pampanga. The next one was from Lubao, Pampanga to Pilar, Bataan but, that's not the main concern here. My topic is all about the stop over restaurant at Lubao. More specifically, the stop over restaurant used by Genesis bus lines.

Anyway. When the bus arrived at the stop over, I got off and went to the restaurant to get myself something to eat. I was looking at the menu posted over the counter and picked an order. I asked the cashier which among the breakfast items was available. To my dismay, she said, "Wala na po yan. Wala na po lahat niyan. (We don't have those anymore. We don't have any of those.)" WTF! Are they serious? If they don't have anything posted up on the menu, why don't they take it down? They even have tables. What are those for if they don't sell foods served on a plate?

Frustrated, I bought myself a bottle of iced tea and some crackers. And, of course, I used their one of their tables. I sat there until the bus I needed came. When it came, I scattered some cracker crumbs on the table and left. As bad as it may seem, I left it in a mess.

From now on, I'm not riding on a Genesis bus line when going to Bataan just because they use this particular restaurant.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

The Wonderful World of Piracy


The first time I saw the official trailer to the movie X-Men Origins: Wolverine was on YouTube. Great. Another Marvel super-hero movie. What got me excited was at long last, Gambit would be having some airtime, or reel time. The trailer said that the movie would be shown on the 1st of May. That's still a long way away and that would be in the U.S. It would take a few weeks more before it gets shown here in the Philippines.

A few weeks pass and I see pirated copies of the Wolverine movie at the nearby shopping arcade. I didn't take it much notice because I wanted to see it on the big screen even though I know that I would probably miss it anyway. I looked at the DVDs and the seller said, "Malinaw na yan (That's already clear)." Did he say a clear copy? How could that be? It's a new movie. The best they could get would be scenes recorded in a movie theatre somewhere. Shot with a steady hand, it could pass for something watchable.

A friend of mine said he had procured a copy of the pirated movie and told me it was clear as a DVD. How could it be? It was way too early to get such a copy. And then it hit me. The first of May is still a whole month away. It was possible that the pirated copy is an unfinished movie. My curiosity got to me and I borrowed my friend's copy. And I was right. It was an unfinished movie. The CGI wasn't finished. There were some shots taken in a studio by a blank screen. The timers are still on screen. The wires holding the actors weren't even edited out, yet.

I remember a couple of movies that had this kind of early release back in the day. They were Water World and Men In Black. I remember Water World came out early on VHS. The story wasn't really good because the editing wasn't finished yet. The scenes weren't where they were suppose to be at. No continuity. In the case of Men in Black, there were pencil sketches in the movie. The story board was shot and dubbed.

Many patronize the pirated movies simply because they're way cheaper than the originals and they come out earlier than usual. But an unfinished movie is not worth anything, pirated or original. But then again, the unfinished ones usually end up in the special features in your DVD.

My Top 10 Unwanted Filipino Traits Pt.2

I gave you the first half, now here's the top five.

5. Envious crab. Envy and crab mentality altogether.

I don't know why they call it crab mentality. Crabs in a basket don't really pull down one another trying to get out of the basket. Anyway. Many Filipinos hold dear their social status. If some other person betters one person, one must pull the other down and will do so by any means necessary. One might even make up stories if need be. It's a dog eat dog world.

4. Nepotism.

Yes, nepotism is the term used when you favor a family member over a non-family member. But this doesn't only apply to family members. It could also extend to close friends. This happens everywhere in the Philippines. 'There's an opening for VP. I'll appoint my nephew. I know that someone else is more deserving but what will my sister say if I don't give the position to his son.' Sounds familiar, right?

3. Plastikan.

I can't seem to think of another term for this trait. Maybe because it's very Filipino. I guess it is important for us to mingle and show our best side to many people. It is. But sometimes it just goes too far to the extent of really bad acting. If you don't like someone, be it. Show it. But don't let it get in the way of your professional life. Let it stay personal. Or better yet, don't mingle too much. I guess this is one trait that's called a necessary evil.

2. See only evil.

Perhaps only very few people have this trait. Perhaps many. It doesn't matter how many, this trait is a downer and pisses many people off. Sorry folks, but reverse psychology doesn't work on everyone. It's just bad that there are those who see only the bad things about someone. A person makes a mistake, the mistake is highlighted. One blunder and he's branded for life. But if that person does something good, not even a 'good job' or a 'thank you.' That's why many people would rather do mediocre things or less. No recognition, no good job.

1. We complain a lot. The EDSA complex.

Now why did I say this? We may not notice it but, we do. It may be because of a good reason or otherwise but it really annoys me to see mobs marching at EDSA just to get what they want. We don't want our elected president. Get him impeached! We don't like a certain company's policy. Picket! Gas prices are high. Transportation Strike! We don't like the way a person dresses. Take his picture, put it in the blog, and say it sucks! No more mutants!!

Those are the traits that we have that I don't like. Of course, not every Filipino has those. I'm only speaking in general terms because most of us have these traits. I hope the we get rid of these traits or at least lessen them to a tolerable level.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

My Top 10 Unwanted Filipino Traits Pt. 1

We, Filipinos, are known for our hospitality, our being industrious, and our do-what-we-must attitude. But we do have a few traits that make me not like being a Filipino.

10. Last minute everything.

We like doing things the last minute. This is from packing our luggage to doing our research paper to booking flights to doing homework. The list goes on. I don't know why we do this. And to top it off, we even ask for extensions. Geez!

9. Invite thyself. In other words, gate crashing.

It maybe because of us being so hospitable that some would actually abuse the hospitality. It is very common for us to be invited to Fiestas. But Fiestas are a different story because their more of a 'public' occasion. Let's see a more private occasion such as a birthday or a wedding. We Filipinos tend to invite ourselves just because we know the celebrant. And to add damage, we, the not-invited, tend to invite someone else to the occasion. Could we not wait to be invited? We should be ashamed of ourselves.

8. Hospitality to the maximum.

Yes, we are hospitable but we do have limits. And please put limits! In relation to gate crashing, Fiesta. Why do many Filipinos do so much for people they don't know. I mean, they take loans, borrow money from loan sharks, sell their belongings just to have a big feast at their homes during a Fiesta serving someone they don't even know. Excessive spending just to be hospitable. Ever wonder why we're so poor.

7. We think we're the center of the universe.

We would like, as much as possible, that our wants (Yes. That's right. Wants, not Needs.) be given. Everyone must conform to what we want. And I'm speaking in international terms here, not just local. Say an OFW is charged with something. We plead to the country concerned to please free the accused OFW. "Please be merciful." But if a foreigner does something bad to us it's an entirely different story. "Burn him at the stakes! Show no mercy!" Bah! Please people. This is just sickening.

6. Finger pointing.

Do I need to elaborate on this one. This happens everyday. All of us Filipinos know about this. I think most of our laws are based on this premise: Someone must always take the blame even if it's an accident. Maybe because investigating procedures here in the Philippines are just so bad that someone must automatically take the blame. Let's see. A collision of a huge truck and a motorcycle. Motorcycle rider dies, it's the fault of the truck driver. Plausible. But if by some freak of nature that the rider survives and the truck driver dies, it's the fault of the rider. Trust me, that's how it will be. I guess the law states that, I a collision of vehicles, it is always the fault of the survivor even though the survivor is a passenger. This 'sacrificial lamb' concept blows.

To be continued...

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Packing Light Pt. 4

Now that we're done with the airport, let's get to the seaport or pier.

Not many people can afford the flying so the opt to go sailing, or boating, or whatever you call it. It takes a longer time to get to where you're going but it's a lot cheaper and the view would be great. I, myself haven't been on a ship, just a fast craft. Those things get you to the next island in just an hour or so. They go at around 60 knots. Pretty fast for sightseeing. All you can do is peek out the window while seawater splashes all over the sills.

The restricted items on the cabin of the plane are pretty much the same for the sea crafts. The difference is if the item is banned, it's banned. They get confiscated and will not be returned. Unlike on the plane unless it's a total ban on the item, you can put it in you check in luggage instead.

The restricted items are:

- Sharp objects such as knives other bladed instruments. These things are not allowed on the boat. However, instruments used in trade like saws are not confiscated outright. They are taken for safekeeping and will be returned upon arrival to the port of destination.
- Matches and lighters and other ignitable objects. This includes explosives, firearms and munitions.

With my experience, however, confiscation of these items at the port are only strictly enforced during the Holy Week. With the exception of the firearms and munitions and explosives, the other items are not confiscated.

Safety reminders. Same as the plane. Just follow instructions. If you think the vessel is overloaded, report it to the authorities. This may delay your trip but it'll assure your safety. Choose; leave late but assured that you'll get there safe or leave early but unsure if you'll even make it halfway.

Packing Light Pt. 3

For those who frequent the skies or for those who are first-timers or those who are planning to fly, here are some, shall I call them, tips. Since we're in the topic of packing light, I'll be limiting things to hand-carry luggage that you can bring inside the cabin.

Hand-carry luggage for most, if not all, airlines are limited to 7 kilograms per person. In other words, limit your luggage to just 7 kilograms including the weight of your bag if you don't want it checked-in. I personally don't want to check in my luggage especially if I have delicate electronics inside. I don't trust the airport personnel in handling cargo.

I once looked out the window of the plane while they were putting in cargo. They were just tossing the cargo like they were stacks of hay. Some of them even had the 'fragile' sticker on them. One even had a 'this side up' sticker and the arrow was pointing down. Seriously. Bad handling. So if I were you, limit your luggage. If you can't avoid it, make sure that whatever luggage that you'll be checking in would contain only or mostly clothes. Clothes don't break even if you toss them around.

Some items are not allowed inside the cabin and would opt you to check in your luggage even if you're below the 7-kg limit. Some of these items are as follows:

- Adhesive tape, packaging tape, duct tape. Why would you bring these things in the cabin in the first place?
- Liquids such as alcohol, colognes, perfumes, etc. You can bring these things in the cabin but in limited quantities. Make sure that the total volume of these things do not exceed 100 ml or you'll just have to check your luggage in.
- Sharp objects such as knives and the like. Obviously, for security reasons.
- Aerosols. You're canned beauty products like hair spray or body spray. Most of them exceed the 100 ml limit for liquids. And some of them are explosive.
- And with explosives in mind, lighters, matches and other flammable items are not allowed. I don't need to mention firearms and munitions.

Those are just some of the items that are not allowed in the cabin. You'll see a complete list of those at the airport. If by some reason you forgot to put those items in your check-in luggage, they'll get confiscated.

Now, while inside the airplane, please follow instructions. I've been flying for quite some time now and the story's always the same. People just don't know how to follow simple instructions and that irritates me. The flight attendant says not to turn on your cell phone until you enter the terminal building but you'll hear beeping message alerts while the plane is taxing. No standing until the fasten seatbelt sign is switched off but people stand up anyway. This is for your own safety, people. Just because the plane has landed doesn't mean you're safe. One of the worst accidents in aviation history happened on the ground when two planes collided. Think about it and have a nice flight.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Packing Light Pt. 2


I have given you tips in packing clothes. Now, lets pack your other things while still being light.

In the first part, with just one week out of town, you would barely fill out a medium-sized back pack. That leaves room for other stuff. You may want to put some other extra clothes like spare shirts and stuff.

To save space in packing your clothing, it is better to roll them instead of folding them. Rolling saves more space and it doesn't wrinkle your clothes to much.

Packing toiletries is not a very difficult task. Bring only those that you need. The hotel or resort your going to would provide your needed toiletries for free or for a certain amount. But if need be (for the brand specific types), use travel sized, re-sealable, plastic bottles. Or better yet, buy shampoos, lotions and other toiletries in sachets or packs. Put all of your toiletries in a re-sealable plastic zip bag before placing them in your bag. This is in case spillage would occur.

Your must-have toiletries are:
- Toothbrush and toothpaste
- Bath soap
- Sun block

Your extras would be:
- Deodorant
- Cologne
- Perfume
- Body spray
- Hair gel
- Anything that makes you small good and look good are not really must-haves.

Now for the gadgets. This is why some of us are packing light on the clothes so that we can bring our gadgets. If you are traveling as a group, it is better if one person brings one gadget for everyone. If you're solo or just a pair, then bring only those you absolutely need.

Your must-have gadgets are:
- Cell phone and charger (one is enough for those who have two or more)
- Camera (for those moments, it doesn't have to be digital)
- Batteries (you can't use those gadgets if you don't have these)
- Film (in case you're not using a digital camera)

Your extras would be:
- Laptop (working on vacation or on time picture editing?)
- Camcorder (not everyone can afford one, your cell phone camera or digital camera would have to do)
- Portable gaming consoles
- Portable music players
- Anything that you can only use when you're not touring and such is not a must-have.

Packing Light Pt. 1

It's summer once again and many will be going out of town and going to the beach other resorts. If your a light packer like I am, here are some tips on how to determine how much clothing you're going to bring. This is assuming, of course, that you'll be staying in a hotel on your own. If you have someone else in the room, I hope they don't mind you walking around in your underwear. With that in mind, these tips would most likely apply to the men but I'll try my best to give variations or adjustments for the women.

For shirts, it is always better to choose those with light colors and light fabrics. Light fabrics take less space. That goes for everything.

Number of Shirts:
For Men: Number of days out of town (includes travel days)
For Women: Number of days out of town (includes travel days) + 2

Number of pairs of underwear:
For Men: Number of days out of town (ditto)
For Women: Number of days out of town (ditto) x 2

Number of pairs of pants:
For Men: Number of weeks out of town (truncated, so 1.5 is 1, and 2.2 is 2)
For Women: Number of weeks out of town (rounded to the next, so 1.5 is 2, and 2.2 is 3) x 2

In case you'll go swimming (which is likely), Number of swimwear:
For Men: Number of days out of town - 1
For Women: (Number of days out of town - 1) x 1.5 (rounded to the next)

Number of Face towels or handkerchiefs (the big bandana ones):
For Men and Women: Number of days out of town (if possible x 2)

Number of bath towels (if the hotel does not provide one or if you prefer to use your own)
For Men and Women: 1 (it doesn't matter how long it takes you, towels are bulky)

Take note that the number of clothes above only covers those that you will wear when you go outside your room. Like I said, if you and your roommate don't mind walking around in your underwear. You may use pants that can be converted into short pants, the ones with the detachable leg parts, in case you'd like to go strolling in shorts. Also, you may want to use sandals instead of shoes. So you could avoid bringing a pair of shoes and a pair of flip flops. The trick here is to use two-for-one or all-in-one things in order to travel light.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Filipina Fashion


It's interesting how the Filipina tends to have a 'uniform' every now and then. From the classic Baro't Saya to today's green pants and white top that looks a little bit like the one on the left.

Almost every Filipina (I said almost every, I didn't say all) wears that outfit, clothing combination, or whatever you might call it, may she be a child, teen, young adult, adult, old, really old, stout, skinny, sexy... It must be the Emo clothing influence. The tight fitting pants and the green is kind of the hints. Of course there are other variations to thins get-up. Green pants are sometimes taken place by blue or pink but with the same fit.
I wonder what 'uniform' the Filipina would be having in the next few years.